In love with love, and so far, it has been pretty Procrustean.

"If I know what love is, it is because of you." - Herman Hesse

I honestly don't think that I have been in love romantically with anyone to feel this way. I think I have come close many times, but I have never felt this love, this love that eludes me and teases me. It is the carrot that I've chased after my entire adult life, in one way or another. For people, it is sometimes fame, it is fortune, it is power, it is money, it is that sailboat, it is that BMW, that blonde... for me it's been love


So, I have learned to... embrace it. And to embrace it as honestly and as authentically as possible. But I am not going to try to cut off someone's legs or arms for love, like that Greek sociopath Procrustes. Because what has happened with everyone in my past, every single person, without exception, is that I've wanted this elusive all consuming passionate love so much that I have allowed myself to settle for almost, for oh so close, for nearly all there... And now, I have decided. I am NOT going to cut anything off of me, either. For anyone. I am not going to turn on myself again. To love, one must start with self love. It is all there is.

So... I've learned over time that it was more my pride and ego that broke. Don't get me wrong, it hurts just as bad. My heart was never broken, it just felt that way, as it was an illusion overshadowed by the obsessive need of my monkey mind, which was broken via its ego and pride, and wow, such a tricksies. These days, I am so grateful for vipassana... I am putting the mind in the cage and in time out more and more as the days pass. It has had free reign for far too long in my life.

Someone very close to me said that what I once thought was love was merely infatuation and it would pass, and I know, that, as usual, he was right... In conclusion, I am done with Procrustean love. No more cutting. If it fits, it fits. If it doesn't, I am not going to force something that it is not to be, to be. I am moving on from the way I lived that part of my life.

"Our passions are true phoenixes; as the old burn out the new straight rise up from the ashes-" Johann Wolfgang von Goethe.


So, well, that's that. I've done confessed. In parting, I want to wish everyone very happy trails in love, in whatever ways that rocks your world. Now I have freed up so much room upstairs, I can focus with all my intensity on subjects that matter, like Chemistry...

Viva l'amore, viva le vie!

P.S. Want to know who Procrustes was, and the Greek mythology surrounding this cruel fellow? Read about him HERE (click)

Or you can go to the library and find out more...